I know we have all heard the phrase, "communication is key." It really is! I think that good communication skills are awesome and come in really great hand when dealing with marriages and families. However, I think we often blame problems in marriages and families on, "poor communication," when the problem really lies a bit deeper than that. When real problems arise, they often effect the way that we communicate with those around us. When a husband is frustrated with his wife he may withdrawal emotionally. Therefore the way he communicates with her changes. He may be more quiet, withdrawn, uninterested or inattentive. When a wife is frustrated with her husband she may be more anxious, critical, snappy, or volatile. And vice versa. This does not necessarily mean that these individuals have poor communication skills. Instead, it means that there is a problem that needs to be fixed.
With this in mind, there are indeed ways to make sure we are keeping up with our good communication. We can make sure that we are facing the person we are talking to and keeping good eye contact. We can make sure that we are not on any kind of technological device such as a phone, iPad, or computer when someone is talking to us. We can also make sure that we are available when our family members or spouse is trying to get a hold of us, or trying to talk to us in person. Our tone and the way we say things is also important to always keep in mind. It is important to make our family members feel like they are a top priority in order to have happy marriages and families. The things we do are often much more important than the things we say in terms of caring and loving (although it is always important to say, "I love you.") But often times our spouse and family members will better know that we love them by the way that we interact around them, and the things that we do for them.